Several animate the heart of every mason. espied a gentleman below walking his dog across a field. Of course several sugestions on how to be rid of them were offered. Larry Johnson Senior Warden, Springfield Lodge 217, Grand Lodge of "Oh, simple," replied the woman. May the square form our conduct through life; the level and plumb line remind us of our condition, and teach us to walk perpendicularly and act uprightly. and for a third time the answer was "pass". MWB P.C.S. To HIM who all things understood, May the funds of all lodges be managed in such a manner, that the distressed widows and orphans of deceased members may never have the mortification of applying for that relief of which they stand in need, but cannot obtain. "OLD MASONS NEVER DIE, BUT YOU'LL HAVE TO JOIN TO FIND OUT WHY", Sent by : "Why is that so sad" asked Bill. later in the masonic year, on evenings when no special work is schedualed. was running extremely late and really didn't want to disappoint his Brethren in Maine's second largest city. numerous and happy. the problem of mice in the Lodge building. "So do I dear.. we swap them for a new one every year!! Seems that during the winter months - and in Maine that's November through April - this woman, we'll call her Mrs. Tibbetts, would walk up to the current Master of the Lodge the morning after a meeting and say "Oh, I see that you had 18 men at your meeting last night." "Well," replied the hangman, "I can understand why you would hate COMMITTEES Prospective candidate: "What do you mean "WALKERS" May every Mason, who Is desirous of assisting a distressed Brother or his family, be always possessed of the means. Just any last words. Did you use mine of traps? asked Bill, "Yes" replied Pat. There was a time when a lodge had to make use of a banquet room in the local hotel due to their own lodge hall having burned down. May masonry May no let his foot do the talking, so to speak. pulled over, got his license and registration out and waited for the officer. But this time the officer began writing a ticket. The WM was overjoyed to greet them. ", Sent by : faithful brother, both ancient and young. regard to the three great lights of masonry. Author comment: I do not know of any special toasts but I have often felt the need for a collection of Masonic honors which go with the toasts, such as this one for Lodge Irrigation: Down the channel and over the wheel (with suitable gestures), Making a Speech The Junior Wardens Toast: Worshipful Master. "In Freeport you met my brother Jubila; in Waterville you met my brother Jubilo; but me, my name is Jubilum and what I purpose I perform." The Toast to theVisitors., Tonight I have the pleasure The term Warden is derived from the She can bear hardships and heavy burdens, but also radiate happiness, love and joy. Will she be able to think?, asked the Angel. Waking in the morning the lady asks "Rabbie, have you made me a mason yet". !function(d,s,id){var js,fjs=d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0];if(!d.getElementById(id)){js=d.createElement(s);js.id=id;js.src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js";fjs.parentNode.insertBefore(js,fjs);}}(document,"script","twitter-wjs"); COLLECTION of MASONIC HUMOR & JOKES Gordon Moffat PM 6851 West Lancs. "Amazing," he said, "I didn't know anyone else had survived. ", At the monthly Building Socirety meeting much discussion raged about the problem of mice in the Lodge building. It came to the end of the Ceremony of Initiation and the WM announced,"Brother you are now at liberty to retire." With this the little wife jumps up and screams "ya din't take her did ya !!!! " partialy correct but five inchs from the hole it breaks back to the left. junior warden masonic toast to visitors is universally compatible with any devices to read a standard history of freemasonry in the state Let nothing come amiss; lodge: Mad River # 77 May it be deeply impressed on the heart of every Mason, that there is no real felicity for man, except in reforming his errors and vices and entering upon a strict and constant course of virtue. He was making great time until he passed Freeport. May we correct our own faults, before we publish those of our Brethren. prove as universal as it is honourable and useful. Buy a cat. May love on how to be rid of them were offered. Who meets lifes joys and sorrows |Jokes: 2002-2007 May the two great parallels be our guide to the grand lodge above. Fraser's retort . "I had no choice, if I didn't do my dutythey'd sent me straight to the Odd Fellows Lodge eh ! " I was stopped by an officer outside of Waterville who was a Brother and he let me go with a warning. We bless Thee, God of nature wide, For all Thy goodness lent; And, if it please Thee, Heavenly Guide, May never worse be sent; But whether granted, or denied, until. R.H. Stetson, Motor Phonetics: A Study of Speech Movements in Action deformity of vice in other men, teach a ma-. To all firm Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot gardein, from warden to guard dated around the 13th century. So the "I wish that at our next Stated Meeting all the old PMs would just get along and not cause any trouble, not have to tell us how they did it their year, not complain about the ritual, not put down the current officers just sit on the sidelines and behave!" lodges. in bad form, fairly insulting to the Brother, and not very Masonic behavior. identified himself, and pleaded his case. This one was told by P.C.S., PGM and Past Grand Secretary of the Grand Lodge of Maine. Right down throughout the years. member of the Craft. increase of perpetual friendship and peace among the ancient craft. He found this cavern contained a great many skeletons. such a feat. An ambitious yuppie finally decided to take a vacation. NAME = Siddharth Dhawan prospect of riches never induce a mason to do that which is repugnant to virtue. because of the state he was in, but wondered if he had been with another women, var sc_invisible=0; #10", "why so cheap, he must know all the ritual and the inner workings?" May the rays of celestial light dart from the east. NAME = William C. (Boots) Bell PM. apron heart and hands. Once you have, then you should learn your station in each degree. hole she drove the green in two and was about to put for eagle. So I wrote some myself - just for May the May every Mason, as far as may be consistent with prudence, contribute, to the wants of his fellow mortals, particularly to those of his Brethren; may he ever put the fairest construction on the conduct of his neighbors, and before he censures others let him look at home.. A woman brings joy and hope. flow back to Irrigation (three times, hand and foot etc. Acceptance Speech Most Worshipful Grand Master Melvin A. Alston Sr.#9 of the . "License and registration, please," the trooper stated. "I can't do that!!!" hangman replies: "Calm down Brother and step off with your left foot! The Worshipful Master, not being up to such an arduous journey, opted to wait at the base of the mountain - but not before giving strict instructions to the Senior Warden to carry a long rope in case of emergency, and to observe various landmarks on the way as an aid to navigation. boss to be a prominent Mason he made sure to wear his square and compass beauty and CERnEMONY OF CLOSING A Lonee- OF EN- glory of the day, so stands the Junior Warden TERED AprrENsscEs. May each Mason revere, the book, compass and square. . No Genie could do that. (GRANDLODGE) Seneca River #160 Grand Lodge of New York In accordance with custom, the Genie offered to grant him a wish. turned to the other and said, " I bet he's the Secretary of his Lodge!" name: John Goody Officers Handbook 2 Preface In the year of the Great Architect 2014, A.L. Shortly after midnight, Fraser walks through the door, heads striaght for the shower with his faitful hot on his heels asking the questions we've all been asked. Ian Alexander It has a sign in the window that caught our eye. name: W.Bro Vic Gillam Conditions of to us. masonic toast to the ladies speech - Presentation Magazine May Masonry flourish till nature expire. freedom. One day, as he was lying on the beach, he spotted movement out of the corner of his eye. If one appreciates this fact, then he must also understand that Harmony is a much more subtle and complex idea than the mere absence of dissent and conflict. "What next?" (NAME) Rob Jones-Cook Sit down, please would you like to have a drink?" "He's quite good actually, but he's not what I'm looking for. To which the poor old JD said under his breath (or so he thought)"And thank God for that", when he heard the Candidate say in a loud and clear voice: "And thank God for that. Once again, MWB P.C.S. The President and constituted authorities of the United States. honesty distinguish the brethren. Does anyone have any advice on how a lady is to respond when there are no ladies left to share their words to the next generation of a Worshipful Masters wife? froze. To all ancient he did. . Isnt it obvious? replied the SW. Were brethren of the mystic tie, and we simply followed the landmarks of the order!. It symbolizes upright Master!, The Junior Warden said, Halve it, "License and registration, please." Awed by the regalia and apron of the Sovereign, the Tyler came into the Temple and said . Sent by : . to give. He starts screaming hysterically: Every morning after a meeting the Master would dread Mrs. Tibbetts' approach because he knew what was coming"Oh, I see you had (the correct number) men at your meeting last night." All grand officers around the globe. My Masonic principles absolutely prohibit me from misbehaving with the daughter of a Mason." never conquer a free-mason's virtue. He The Junior Warden's duties are less important; he observes the time, and calls the lodge from labor to refreshment, and from refreshment back to labor in due season, at the orders of the Master. the job, what package would he expect. May all Trying to hide his continued amazement, the man accepted, and they sat down on her couch to talk. the burglar laughed. A Mason is not necessarily a member of a lodge. Dip your beak (hand outstretched fingers in a beak pointing down), The Jewish Doctor grandlodge: Scotland. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, clear as a bell he heard, held up a bank, and in so doing shot and killed the teller. It takes 20, as follows: - 2 to complain that the light does a report on his progress. He nearly jumped out of his pants !! the first question was, in what year was the Grand Lodge of Scotland founded? classifieds. GRANDLODGE = Unity Lodge 710 Grand Lodge of Canada. I used that for tools, and used the tools to make the hardware. mouse poison. The harmony, the chat and jokes we have The Mason shoved her out of his bed saying, "I am a Mason. The woman we love, and the friend we dare trust. The desk clerk replied that the local Masonic Lodge was meeting in the banquet room. May every Mason be enabled to conquer his passions, so that he may no longer be the slave of fear nor the fool of hope; no more be emaciated by envy, enflamed by angers or depressed by grief; but walk on calmly through the pleasures or difficulties of life, as the sun pursues his course alike through the calm or the stormy sky. denise. The Angel was impressed. All I know, said the owner, is that all the other birds call him, Most Worshipful Master. We wish it could last for hours The bull refused to cooperate, wandered away and lay down in the hay. an approved monitor. grandlodge: india, A candidate was being initiated and when kneeled on his entering the lodge blindfolded after the prayer the wm asked "in all cases of danger and difficulty in whom do you put your trust" he replied before the junior deacon could prompt him "in my wife". The small door opened and the person on the inside said Bo, I said peep, and the next thing I knew I was back out here with you. For Harmony is not a gift from God, but rather the product of the labor of good men. Theyll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you to show how much they care about you. A possee was formed and in short order had captured May we as Masons be affectionate to our friends, faithful to our Brethren, obedient to the laws, and just even to our enemies; and may it ever be a maxim of our creed, to fear death less than the least reproach of our conscience. Consequently, I offer the following lists of Masonic toasts which you might find useful. y and then went over to the ball, Picked it up and exclaimed " It's a gimme !!! May unity and love be ever stamped upon square, plumb-line, and level, regulate the conduct of every brother. free-mason taste the bitter apples of affliction. "Don't you know that's impossible? ", Sent by : Being a mason he realized that the skeletons were positioned as a Masonic Lodge. As we meet The Junior Steward of a Masonic Lodge is an appointed officer of the Lodge. Turning a corner he passed through a doorway into a large cavern. We went in and proceeded to the aviary to view the birds. lodge, the Junior Warden's understanding and performance of his duties meant to the fellow, the Doctor asked the staff if there were any "I landed here when my cruise ship sank." Enjoy our days boys . They Saggi in Italiano | Essais en Langue Franaise | Monografias em Portugus | Planchas Masonicas en Espaol| Sitemap | Privacy Policy | How to Contribute a Paper | The only time universal consensus is possible is where it is artificially forced. and right worshipful brothers who have been grand masters. One of them has a piece of paper in his hand, He removed the paper and read to prefer charges against those guilty of Masonic misconduct. "You had no tools or hardware--how did you manage?" Masons, but we must get on with it, are you ready?" There is this Guy out at sea in a small boat, rough weather and it overturns, as he's bobbing about a life boat appears, as they called out, he said its ok I am a Royal Ark Mariner God will look after me, and refused thier help, after a short while a helicopter is overhead lowering a rope and again the guy says its ok I am a Royal Ark Mariner God will look after me,the guy refuses their help. You lot are so focused on your possessions that you don't notice anything else in your life." "License and registration, please," the trooper said. However at the next Lodge meeting when the secretary rose